Tuesday, April 29, 2008

A decision must be made...(Originally posted on MySpace on Tuesday, April 18, 2006)

I read the blogs of my Sisters-In-Law and sometimes wish I could wrap my words around the heady debates that frame our complex modern lives. Alas most of my blogs fall simply into the category of "Have you ever thought about how wierd it is that..." or " This one time...". It is probably because aside from being an unapologetic degenerate who squandered his high priced high art education for a chance to get into E3 an hour before the rest of the 'public' I spend most of my time skulking about websites like something awful and chuckling to myself at the ironic 'wit' therein contained. I have tried on occasion to share certain articles with my friends but as it does not have the instant "oh shit" factor of videos on youtube or thatvideosite, they just stare at it and go...I don't wanna read all THAT..I thought it was gonna be funny like strongbad...

So anyway I read this great article about the oncoming inevitble war between Dogs and Robots. It can be found here:

But the curx of it is that Robots will eventually replace dogs as man's best friend unless we act now to stem the undermining of the very fabric of society by these souless metal monsters....

Here's a bulleted list breaking down the differences between Dogs and Robots....Well I thought it was funny at least:

..On Dogs:

Have a keen sense of smell useful for finding lost children.

Like to lick people on the face.

Are furry and soft to the touch.

Like to bury bones in the backyard.

Like to roll around in mud and feces.

Sometimes steal whole pies and other types of food.

Like to fetch sticks and balls thrown by humans.

Cannot actually live on Mars.

Some breeds hibernate during winters.

Are terrified of vacuum cleaners.

On Robots:

Have a keen sense of infrared vision used to shoot humans in the dark.

Like to shoot lasers at your face.

Do not like to be touched because they can never truly know love.

Like to bury landmines and blow up humans.

Like to roll around in piles of human skulls.

Do not understand pies and destroy them.

Like to throw humans into large melting vats or incinerators.

Currently rule Mars.

Some models freeze up in the cold if there are not enough humans outside to kill.

Sometimes are vacuum cleaners.


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